Lightning Fill In The Blank

Jun 15, 2019
Originally published on June 15, 2019 10:48 am
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PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Now onto our final game, Lightning Fill In The Blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill-in-the-blank questions as he or she can - each correct answer now worth two points. Bill, can you give us the scores?

BILL KURTIS: Very tight - Roy, three - Helen, three - Jordan has two.

SAGAL: OK.

(LAUGHTER)

JORDAN CARLOS: Are the stakes really that high?

SAGAL: Oh, I know.

(LAUGHTER)

HELEN HONG: It's life or death, Jordan. It's life or death.

CARLOS: Oh, my gosh.

SAGAL: All right, Jordan. You're in third place. So you're up first.

CARLOS: Yes. I know that.

SAGAL: The clock will start when I begin your first question.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: During an interview with ABC News on Wednesday, President Trump said he would accept damaging information about an opponent given to him by blank.

CARLOS: A foreign power.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Wednesday, Republicans and Democrats rebuked the White House for an $8 billion arms sale to blank.

CARLOS: Saudi Arabia?

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, Nevada became the first state to ban testing potential employees for blank use.

CARLOS: Drugs.

SAGAL: Marijuana - close enough.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Wednesday, President Trump unveiled a redesign for blank.

CARLOS: Oh, Air Force One.

CARLOS: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A Florida man busted for drug possession insisted that the cocaine police found wasn't his, even though they found it in blank.

CARLOS: (Laughter) His hand.

SAGAL: No - even worse - in his nostril.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: On Thursday, all the cases filed in relation to blank's water crisis were dropped.

CARLOS: Flint.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Sunday, blank won his 12th French Open title.

CARLOS: Nadar - wait - Rafael Nadal.

SAGAL: Yes - Rafael Nadal.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: After $10,000 in repair costs for one man's MacBook and multiple trips to the Genius Bar, Apple employees discovered blank.

CARLOS: That he just didn't turn it on.

SAGAL: I'm going to give it to you. They discovered that the screen's brightness was just turned too low.

(LAUGHTER, APPLAUSE)

HONG: What?

CARLOS: Apple care.

CARLOS: At least a dozen Apple employees were brought in to try to repair the laptops broken screen from being dark, despite everything else and the computer working fine. They replaced several key components. They even provided a replacement laptop that, after a few weeks, had the same problem.

(LAUGHTER)

CARLOS: It wasn't until a month later that a technician discovered the laptop's brightness was all the way down. The owner says he can't wait to use it for the two weeks until Apple stops supporting it and forces him to buy a new one.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, how did Jordan do in his first round of fill in the blank?

KURTIS: Jordan was unbelievable.

(APPLAUSE)

CARLOS: Thank you.

KURTIS: You got 7 right out of 8...

(APPLAUSE)

KURTIS: ...For a total of 16 and the lead.

HONG: Wow.

SAGAL: Well done - all right. We have flipped a coin. And Roy has elected to go next. So, Roy, fill in the blank. Following emotional testimony from Jon Stewart, the House Judiciary Committee approved funds for blank.

ROY BLOUNT JR: For 9/11 people...

SAGAL: Yeah - first responders - very good.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, protesters and police clashed in the streets of blank over a proposed change to extradition laws.

BLOUNT JR: Hong Kong.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Wednesday, it was reported that the suspect in the shooting of Red Sox star blank was offered $8,000 in cash to do it.

BLOUNT JR: Who would shoot Big Papi? That's crazy.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: I know.

BLOUNT JR: David Ortiz.

SAGAL: Exactly right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, the town of Rockport, Ind., swore in their newest police officer, whose last job was blank.

BLOUNT JR: Sweeping out the jail.

SAGAL: No, the drummer of the band Five Finger Death Punch.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: On Thursday, the FBI said it was investigating why several American tourists have died while on vacation in blank.

BLOUNT JR: Dominican Republic.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: "Hadestown" and "The Ferryman" were the big winners of the 2018 19 blank awards.

BLOUNT JR: Tony.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Police in England say they'll have no trouble tracking down a drug dealer...

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

SAGAL: ...Who left a giant bag of cocaine in the subway because he also blanked.

BLOUNT JR: He was wearing a - well, there was one cocaine story where he was wearing a shirt that had - said coke on it.

CARLOS: No.

BLOUNT JR: It wasn't?

SAGAL: In this case, they tracked down the drug dealer who left the giant bag of cocaine in the subway because he also labeled the bag with his name and address.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Manchester, England police...

BLOUNT JR: There are a millions of stories in the cokehead city.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Yeah. Manchester police posted about the fine on their Facebook page saying that, in addition to the cocaine, the bag also contained about 25 pills, several white rocks, an electronic scale and one of those little name and address cards that says, if lost, please return to your local drug dealer.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, how did Roy do on our quiz?

KURTIS: He got five points - 10 more points - total of 13 - second place.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: All right. So how many of then does Helen need to win?

KURTIS: She needs 7 to win.

SAGAL: Here we go, Helen. This is for the game. On Wednesday, former White House communications director blank agreed to testify before Congress.

HONG: Sean Spicer?

SAGAL: No, Hope Hicks.

SAGAL: U.S. defense officials say that it's likely that Iran was behind the attack on two blanks in the Gulf of Oman.

HONG: Oh, oil tankers.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, 10 states filed a joint lawsuit seeking to block the $2 billion merger of T-Mobile and blank.

HONG: Sprint.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Monday, a helicopter crashed onto the roof of a building in blank.

HONG: Manhattan.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: After being pulled over by police for driving 105 miles an hour in a 70-miles-per-hour zone, a teenager in Canada told officers blank.

HONG: He had to poop.

SAGAL: That's exactly right.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: He had too many buffalo wings and had to get home to use the bathroom. With a Game 7 victory over the Boston Bruins, the St. Louis Blues won their first ever blank.

HONG: Is it hockey?

SAGAL: Yes. It's the word that you get if you win...

HONG: Stanley Cup.

SAGAL: Yes, very good.

(APPLAUSE)

HONG: Ooh. Oh, my God. I can't believe I knew a sports thing.

SAGAL: To lower wildfire risks, utility company PG&E announced a plan to cut power to over 20,000 customers in blank.

HONG: California.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: After almost a year of restoration work costing over a million dollars...

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

SAGAL: ...The newly restored 19th-century ship in Germany went out to sea and blanked.

HONG: Sank.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

HONG: Ooh.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: They ran into a cargo ship and immediately sank. Historical restorationists have been working and making the 150-year-old ship seaworthy since early 2018. So they were understandably thrilled when they watched it finally head out to sea, immediately steer into a cargo ship and sink.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: The contractors say it's possible that enough of the ship can be salvaged via another restoration.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: But all that's being put on hold while they finish restoring this really cool, hydrogen-filled blimp.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, did Helen do well enough to win and impress her parents?

KURTIS: (Laughter) She got seven right. She has a total of 17 and won - gives her the win.

HONG: Yes.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: Congratulations.

HONG: Yes. Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.